Sunday, April 11, 2010

random angst


"You want up on the couch?"


I am unable to get over how adorable Pumpkin is. Everything he says, is cute. Even when he is screaming and arching his back on the floor to avoid the dreaded diaper change, he is beautiful. How did I get so whipped?

In related news, when does summer get here? Spring keeps teasing me - sure Steph, come on out and work in the yard. It will make you feel better. I PROMISE not to get you wet (sneaky laugh).

I want new shoes. I want to sleep in with my baby every morning. I want a reason to paint my toenails!

In not-so related news, Hubby and I are trying hard to get our groove back - we never used to get on each others cases (and last nerves) like we have been this winter. Counseling is helping some. His new meds are helping some. New work stresses aren't helping so much.

That's right folks, someone gets the butt-end of the staffing changes again this year! On the bright side, I get to keep my job, and I get to stay at my (challenging)awesome(challenging) school, and my new teaching partners is a lady I adore. On the occluded side, I was one of three who got shafted last year, and I am one of two this year - but I am the only repeat.

My take on all this depends on my stress level. When I am feeling chill, I figure it's because I am known to be pretty flexible, and willing to get things done. When the girl drama and lack of HW completion get to me, I start to figure it's because maybe I'm not as good as the other teachers, so they don't mind moving me around.

And lastly, on an equally angsty note, I would like to tell the void how much I hate being asked to talk to authority figures. I ALWAYS have this panic moment, thinking 'omg, I'm in trouble, what did I do? Am I gonna get fired? Arrested? Are they going to make me cry?' Even though my head knows I have been working hard and doing a decent job and waiting for the walk signal. Just one of those little things that reminds me I'm just as crazy as everyone else.

1 comment:

Aimee said...

BS and we both know it; it's that you are a frakking awesome teacher, Birmingham. Doubts come and doubts go, and I'm queen of all doubt, but this I know like I know I'm right-handed or nearsighted: you rock.

also, you make rad babies.

thanks for the other night. I'll see you soon I hope.