Songs we sing*

So far, we like:

Midnight Special
The Other Day I Met a Bear
On Top of Spaghetti
Darling Clementine
Sound of Silence
(Disney) Under the Sea, Part of that World, Be Our Guest, Kiss the Girl, Le Poison...
Old McDonald
Hush Little Baby
What's Love Got to Do with It
Ten Little Ladybugs
Under the Boardwalk
Cecilia
Just a Girl


* or that I sing to him, badly, while he listens patiently

Maternity leave is over

Tight chest, like mourning

I can't stop dreading that I 

work in the morning

Where's Waldo

Susan makes a face. 

I glance, Ha! We found Waldo

at the coffee shop.

It is totally unnatural.  Completely, totally, utterly... I am generally a well indoctrinated citizen of our country - I even teach civics and help indoctrinate the next generation.  But this is one of those times when I would move in heartbeat, were it not such a pain in the ass.  

On Wednesday, when my pumpkin is only 11.5 weeks old, my leave ends.  The state of Oregon required employers to offer at least 12 weeks maternity leave.  So that's what the school districts offer - 60 working days.  And we only get paid for the time that we have already accumulated as sick leave.  Which means that the last 7 weeks have already been unpaid, so I really can't afford more leave, even if they let me.  

Which means that Thursday, 2 days before the holiday vacation starts, I have to go back to work.  I love my work - I am nerdy enough that talking about geography and history and grammar all day actually floats my boat (hence the chosen career path), it's not like some people who never liked their jobs anyway.  But I am having little mini, internal conniptions at the idea of leaving him all day.

And I know that I am soooo fortunate that my husband is at home, so he will be cared for by his daddy and not (expensive) strangers.  This really doesn't make me feel any better, at all.  He only calms down for me.  He wants his mommy, which is totally natural.  The real problem, of course, is that his mommy wants him too.  I hate that he is even sleeping in his own room now, instead of with me - how am I supposed to concentrate on work, or students, or anything at all, when I know that he will be upset at my absence, and I won't be able to comfort him.

And this is not even to mention the fact that he does NOT like to take a bottle - as he has spent the last 6 weeks demonstrating.  So it will be stressful for him, stressful for his dad, stressful for me.

Really, how am I supposed to leave every morning?

Amsterdam sounds pretty fabulous about now.

Sleep sack from Shiori

Those kids in Japan

must be tiny! The label

says up to 3 years.

His own room, already

I'm almost in tears, 

but he sleeps peacefully. Can't 

be so big so soon!

Snips and snails

Random, but my favorite bits are:

His adorable smile (of course)

His perfect arms

and his gorgeous hair swirl

roses are red

violets are blue

I made daddy change

your huge daily poo.

Raking

It is amazing

in four days how many leaves

can fall from one tree

Meme

just for amusement

Me in braids, such cuteness will

ROCK the internet

meme from Helen, my favorite blog

Baby group

Bigger, perfect smile,

curls in his hair. Cutest boy 

(I'm partial, of course!)

Boo

chocolate in bowl

leaves and pumpkins everywhere

and practice screaming

1 month

The house is asleep

rest calls my name. I lay here

soaking up baby.

days blur into weeks

the pictures prove a month gone

baby, not newborn.

nezumi

big head (smart, for year

of the rat) but who knew he

would be so perfect!

the only one I want to be there

wakened as he kicks
my lung, I cry for wishing
grandma could meet him

ready to burst

a roll, an elbow
constant motion, Aliens
screens in my noggin

His first hiccups

Sprinklers? It must be
4:30, I wake up to
rhythmic baby bumps

Lazy Sunday

cats and white shoes sprawl
around the living room as
July settles in.

Flight Path

Look! yellow beak, long
neck, downy, backyard flight path
of fledgling herons

No one warns you

Expecting swelling
warned of fatigue, but he kicks
hard enough to hear

Early June

Winding down the year
exhausted before I start
I'll cry when they're gone

Project Grading

knrk streams
sounds from Portland. Grading flies
once the kids go home.

He hears them

quiet, calm, Pre sleeps
student chatter comes at 9
and he kicks along

spring

dripping pale green buds
roaring falls, trillium, moss,
worth the aching hips