Wednesday, February 11, 2009

phantom baby


I know this is going to sound weird, or morbid (it sounds very morbid in my head)...

Here I am, pumping my lunch away, as usual. I have been told that to help let the milk down, I can look at pics of the Pumpkin. My office is small, with all the shades drawn for privacy, an old desk (mostly empty) a dusty phone, a green work table, some bookshelves with notebooks and boardgames, a counter full of drying dishes and red plastic cups for the kids, the constant "mm-mm mmwwOOo" of the pump.

Normal, teachery, middle-schooly stuff. So the overly-dramatic feeling is pretty much out of place.

But my arms are tingling. Looking at the image on my screensaver of the Hubby in the kitchen, holding the Pumpkin in his candy-cane pj's, is giving me this tingly feeling like there is a phantom baby in my arms. Kinda like (I can only imagine, thank goodness) they say that when you lose a limb, you still feel it there.

My baby is at home, but I still feel him here. Don't know if it's cool, or creepy, or just strange.

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